f*&$k! I did it.

i did it, another workout done! I got up from a nap to workout, crazy i know. I was pretty darn comfy too. but i figure if i keep acting like a slug i will continue to look like one. As i workout i discover how foreign my body really has become to me. It is easy to ignore the space i occupy while i am just sitting and being a lazy ass. As i am going through the movements i am becoming very aware of the fat that is in the way of my body moving freely. How gross is that!? i just want to push it off and feel free again. It makes me angry and i channel that anger into the workout. I have to remind myself that I am doing something to change and change takes fucking timmmme!!!! I deserve the change though! I want to feel good about myself. If you are happy with who you are then good for you, but i am not. I hate that even when i sit i am uncomfortable! That my belly looks like a front butt! No one wants two asses! I can’t scratch my damn back or shoulder! My thighs fight for the same space! I despise shopping and i have to admit it is largely because I hate trying on clothes, not finding clothes that fit well and settling for clothes i hate. I did the same workout as yesterday, the week one of J.Michaels 30 day plan. 

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